PsychoSexual

Only not quite that kind of "psycho" and not quite that kind of "Sexual"

Posts tagged celibacy

50 notes

Resources for sex-repulsed people?

bubonickitten:

Does anyone have any links to specific resources for sex-repulsed people? Like, things on how to cope with compulsory sexuality & being sex-repulsed in a society that places so much emphasis on sex?

Or, are there any sex-repulsed people reading this who would be willing to be a resource for another sex-repulsed individual?

Someone asked me for resources or people to talk to about being sex-repulsed, so if anyone has any links, can you share them, and if anyone is open to being a resource, can you let me know so I can pass your username on to this person?

(Tagging this w/ ace-related tags because sex repulsion is a common experience among aces, but I recognize that not all sex-repulsed people are ace spectrum and any resources you have to offer are welcome & don’t have to be specifically ace-related.)

(via southpawscopic)

Filed under lgbt LGBTQIA gsd celibacy genophobia

67 notes

ff-lgbt:

Via The Sociological Cinema:

Celibacy and asexuality are two very different things. Celibates are people who may have sexual attraction, but refrain from sexual activity, whereas asexuals have no sexual desires with any gender. Not all asexuals are celibate.

Check also videos from GirlfriendsTV:

DO ASEXUALS MASTURBATE?
DO ASEXUALS HAVE SEX?
ASEXUAL LESBIAN / ROMANTIC ORIENTATION


That picture is so confusing. It makes it look like asexuality is anti-heterosexuality or not having a gender or something. Then again, I have no idea what a picture of sexual attraction should look like. Just hope people aren’t getting a glimpse of it & get the wrong idea.

ff-lgbt:

Via The Sociological Cinema:

Celibacy and asexuality are two very different things. Celibates are people who may have sexual attraction, but refrain from sexual activity, whereas asexuals have no sexual desires with any gender. Not all asexuals are celibate.

Check also videos from GirlfriendsTV:

DO ASEXUALS MASTURBATE?

DO ASEXUALS HAVE SEX?

ASEXUAL LESBIAN / ROMANTIC ORIENTATION

That picture is so confusing. It makes it look like asexuality is anti-heterosexuality or not having a gender or something. Then again, I have no idea what a picture of sexual attraction should look like. Just hope people aren’t getting a glimpse of it & get the wrong idea.

Filed under asexuality celibacy

289 notes

metapianycist:

[A screenshot from the Weather Channel’s webite depicting an article called “Could we survive without sex?”]
fauxmosexualtranstrender:

Okay, so I’m not asexual at all so I can’t exactly relate to or understand the frustration, but I’m pretty certain that this is what people who are asexual are talking about when they say that they feel completely alienated by the expectation that everyone needs sex all the time.
For fuck’s sake, this is the fucking WEATHER CHANNEL.


.
.

Just in response to that article……
No, no we couldn’t survive without sex.
I’m a 21 year old who never had sex. I was concerned about this, so I told my gyn about my virginity status after asking me if I was sexually active. He asked me if I planned on having sex any time soon to fix this.
I said no.
He gave me 2 more weeks to live.
.
.
.
..
..
.
Really, HOW IS THIS FUCKING NEWS?!?

metapianycist:

[A screenshot from the Weather Channel’s webite depicting an article called “Could we survive without sex?”]

fauxmosexualtranstrender:

Okay, so I’m not asexual at all so I can’t exactly relate to or understand the frustration, but I’m pretty certain that this is what people who are asexual are talking about when they say that they feel completely alienated by the expectation that everyone needs sex all the time.

For fuck’s sake, this is the fucking WEATHER CHANNEL.

.

.

Just in response to that article……

No, no we couldn’t survive without sex.

I’m a 21 year old who never had sex. I was concerned about this, so I told my gyn about my virginity status after asking me if I was sexually active. He asked me if I planned on having sex any time soon to fix this.

I said no.

He gave me 2 more weeks to live.

.

.

.

..

..

.

Really, HOW IS THIS FUCKING NEWS?!?

(Source: )

Filed under seriously though what is this bullshit? like really wtf sexuality celibacy asexuality sex virgin drama just go with it

48 notes

.F i i S h.: Okay since it keeps happening

voltafiish:

To the lovely people who post in the Ace Tags:

Greetings. I am Fiish and I am a gray-romantic (gray biromantic to be exact) asexual. For shorts: I am asexual.

What this means is that I do not experience sexual attraction!

Being asexual is not:

  • A “get out of drama” free card for relationship…
  • Something you can just “become” when you are having relationship problems

Being asexual is:

  • Simply not experiencing sexual attraction

Asexuality does not:

  • Fix your relationship problems
  • Make your life easier
  • Make u supr kewlll
  • FIX. YOUR. RELATIONSHIP. PROBLEMS.


You cannot “become” asexual just because you are going through things. You can, however, become celibate. Or you could just not focus on relationships. 

Please note that asexual people using these tags may call you out on your shit.

We’re really tired of having our sexual orientation used in this way. 

Please don’t turn it into some magical, fix-it-all cure for relationship drama.

Because it isn’t.

Thank you.

-Fiish

This desperately needs to be reblogged. Over & over again.

(Source: apollyween)

Filed under asexuality attraction celibacy gsm help love relationships romance sex the more you know identity

18 notes

Sexuality spectrum

My very first blog entry! Why am I so nervous?  >_>

So I finally decided to put together & share a little something to try to help break down & differentiate the little details that make up human sexuality. I was motivated to do this mainly because of the confusion & misconceptions some people have about asexuality, but it goes on to much more than that (except with it’s relation to romance, that’s a whole other mess I’ll work on).

It isn’t perfect, but I think it covers the basics.

______________________________________________________________

   Some people like to believe that you are either simply gay or straight, that you must have a libido and that feeling dictates your behavior or vice versa. But being the complex beings that we are, we can not be boxed-in in such a simplified way and expect it to be an accurate portrayal of how we function or experience certain aspects of life. The truth is human sexuality is ridiculously complicated (even more more so when taking romantic attraction into account) and may even appear paradoxical on the surface in some people. Because of this, many people struggle with finding their sexual identity or to simply understand their own feelings.

  This little document will distinguish the detailed aspects of sexuality by displaying four distinct categories (sexual attraction, libido, attitude & behavior) & briefly describing said categories as well as a description for some of the terms used at the end of their respective segment. It also explains that while these categories & certain aspects may have some influence over each other, none of them dictate, restrict or are wholly dependent on one another. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  •    Sexual attraction

Instinctively finding an individual sexually appealing, ultimately making you feel or think something along the lines of “I’d tap that”; an individual automatically triggers cognitive sexual interest (sexual desire & intrusive sexual fantasies) and/or a physical sexual response (such as sex drive, sexual arousal or tingling in the genitals) due to their characteristics when sensing or thinking about them

Directional presence of attraction continuum

Testoronic sex——————-All sexes———————Estrogenic sex

 Androsexual                           Bisexual                    Gynosexual

N/A: physical sex of person is irrelevant - pansexual []

Directional absence of attraction continuum

Testoronic sex———————All sexes———————Estrogenic sex

Gynosexual                         Asexual                     Androsexual

Basis continuum

Internal———————Balanced———————-External

       1     2      3      4      5      6      7      8      9      10

N/A: no sexual attraction to individuals - asexual []


Mind-body response continuum 

Mental————————————————————-Bodily

       1      2       3       4       5       6       7       8       9       10

N/A: no sexual attraction to individuals - asexual []


Circumstance/frequency continuum

Never——————-Limited———————-Commonplace 

  Asexual                  Graysexual              Allosexual

Flexibility continuum 

Rigid—————————————————————-Fluid                               

    1     2      3      4      5      6      7      8      9      10


Sexual orientation - enduring pattern of presence or absence of sexual attraction toward individuals (based on feelings since, not behavior or sexual history which can be chosen or driven by other factors); the principles are fundamentally similar if not identical to that of romantic orientation, though it’s possible for both orientations to function independently of each other since they are based on different types of attraction

Androsexual - sexually attracted to people with testosteronic features, not sexually attracted to people with estrogenic features (heterosexuality in females, homosexuality in males)

Gynosexual - sexually attracted to people with estrogenic features, not sexually attracted to testosterone features (heterosexuality in males, homosexuality in females) 

Bisexual - sexually attracted to multiple sexes (may or may not have preference)

Pansexual - sexually attracted to individual regardless of their physical sex 

Asexual - not sexually attracted to members of any sex or gender; still capable of experiencing sexual pleasure, libido & being sexually active, but sexual interest cannot be instinctively directed toward any individual or triggered by their characteristics (just as females are to androsexuals & males to gynosexuals) 

Graysexual - someone whose experience of sexual attraction to others is consistently infrequent, limited to specific circumstances, weak or otherwise ambiguous; direction of attraction is not relevant (ex, andro-graysexual, bi-graysexual, etc)

Allosexual (“Sexual” most commonly used) - someone whose circumstance of experiencing sexual attraction to others is within society’s expectations; direction of attraction is not relevant

Mind-body response - how much experiencing sexual attraction leans more toward a cognitive or physical reaction; may or may not be dissonance 

Internally based - sexual attraction is mainly dependent on individual’s psychological qualities such as personality, mentality, quirks and culturally recognized gender expression

Externally based - sexual attraction is mainly dependent on individual’s physical qualities such as appearance, voice, smell, age and distinguishing characteristics of biological sex

Sexual fluidity - sexual orientation is somewhat prone to change

Sexual rigidity - sexual orientation remains consistent

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  • Libido & body’s general sexual functioning

A general mental and/or physical interest in or craving for sexual activity or sexual stimulation. 

It can exist in people of all sexual orientations as it may or may not be directed toward anyone or anything specifically. Libido and sexual arousal are commonly expected to just be invoked by sensing or thinking about certain individuals mainly due to their characteristics (sexual orientation), but it can by triggered by other things and scenarios such as certain objects (fetish), observing/engaging in certain activity regardless of the individuals involved, stimulation of erogenous zones (even if the touch was never desired or consented) or may act up unexpectedly on it’s own. 

Sex drive frequency continuum

Low—————-Average———————High

[] N/A: Nonlibidoist

Sex drive strength continuum

Weak——————Average—————-Strong

[] N/A: Nonlibidoist

Sex drive influence

Stimuli depedent——————————————-Spontaneous

     1     2     3     4     5     6     7     8     9     10

[] N/A: Nonlibidoist

Sexual motivation continuum

Hyposexual——————-Isosexual—————————Hypersexual

      1     2      3      4      5      6      7      8      9      10


General pleasurablilty from sexual contact (solo)

Unpleasant—————————Satisfied————————-Enjoyable

     1      2      3     4     5      6      7      8      9      10

[] Mixed feelings  [] N/A: Never masturbated

General pleasurablilty from sexual contact (partnered)

Unpleasant—————————Satisfied————————-Enjoyable

1      2      3      4      5      6      7      8      9      10

[] Mixed feelings  [] N/A: No sexual history

Sexual arousal - reflexive reaction to prepare the body for the possibility of sexual contact, such as vaginal lubrication and penile erection; response to or result of certain activity and/or stimulation of erogenous zones, often associated with sex drive

Sex drive - physical craving for sexual stimulation, the bodily counterpart to sexual motivation (though one can exist without the other), often associated with sexual arousal; may or may not be triggered by external influences

Nonlibidoism* - not having a sex drive

Libidoism - having a sex drive, regardless of it’s frequency, strength or circumstance of occurrence 

Sexual motivation - conscious interest in engaging in sexual activity or sexual stimulation, the mental counterpart to sex drive (though one can exist without the other); may be generalized or unconsciously directed 

Hyposexuality (or sexual apathy) - very little to no sexual motivation

Isosexuality - typical amount of sexual motivation 

Hypersexuality - excessive sexual motivation


* Nonlibidoism is sometimes seen as an inherent “side effect” of asexuality, which is not true and may even be potentially harmful to believe. Having a sex drive isn’t necessary to live a healthy, fulfilling life, but in some cases an unexpected change or complete lack of sex drive can be a symptom of a serious medical issue. Even if being a nonlibidoist is not distressing to you, it’s a good idea to see a doctor just to make sure that nothing else is going on.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  • Attitudes

One’s disposition about self or others engaging in sexual behavior. May have as much influence on sexual behavior or celibacy as much as sexual attraction or lack thereof. Not necessarily connected to one’s sexual orientation and is much more subject to change through experience. 

Personally having sex in general

Repulsed————————-Indifferent—————————-Enthusiastic 

[] Mixed feelings

Society having sex

Sex-Negative————————Sex-Neutral————————-Sex-Positive

[] Mixed feelings

                       

Having experimental sex

Timid—————————————————————-Adventurous

   1      2       3       4       5       6       7       8       9       10

Sex-Negative - perceives expression of sexuality/sexual behavior as immoral or something best to be avoided

Sex-Neutral - no strong attitude about other’s expression of sexuality/sexual behavior or otherwise perceieves it as a generally neutral topic

Sex-Positive - perceives expression of sexuality/sexual behavior as something that is potentially positive as long as it is consensual 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  • Behavior 

Choices of engaging in or avoiding sexual activity. Behavior such as frequency of having sex and the physical sex of one’s sexual partners is often heavily influenced by sexual orientation for obvious reasons, but can be driven by a number of other things that does not necessarily negate one’s sexual identity such as:

- attitudes toward sex

- curiosity

- exploring one’s sexuality or comfort zone

- compromising with or pleasing romantic partner

- concealing true feelings

- following one’s own moral code

- survival/pressure

- looking for sexual pleasure disregarding who it’s from


Activity 

Celibate——Low———————————————————High

      []           1     2      3      4      5      6      7      8      9      10


Promiscuity 

Committed——————————————————-Casual  

   1     2      3      4      5      6      7      8      9      10

N/A: doesn’t engage in partnered sexual activity - Celibate []


    Partner’s physical sex
Exclusively male———————————————Exclusively female

N/A: doesn’t engage in partnered sexual activity - Celibate []

Number of partners at a time 

None/Mono/Poly 

Style preference 

Vanilla—————————————————————Kinky 

     1     2      3      4      5      6      7      8      9      10

[] Switch

Submissive———————————————————-Dominant 

    1     2      3      4      5      6      7      8      9      10

[] Switch

Receiver—————————————————————Performer

     1     2      3      4      5      6      7      8      9      10

[] Switch

N/A: doesn’t engage in partnered sexual activity - Celibate []

_____________________________________________________________________

I think I got a little too careless with the behavior aspect (some of it isn’t that relevant & I probably left out somethings worth putting in) but I think this can be overall useful.

So I think I got to everything I wanted to for now.

Anything that should be clarified or tweaked?

Filed under ace asexuality attitude attraction bisexual celibacy continuum desire gray A gyno hypersexuality hyposexuality identity introspection libido pansexual queer questioning sex drive sex-negative sex-positive behavior preferences complex